…and you won’t be able to see it unless you have Visa.

April 22nd, 2004 | by Mike |

Stupid damn Visa
My girlfriend, Robin, was watching Dateline or one of the shows like that about a year ago and she sees this peice about the new broadway show Movin’ Out. Well its got songs in it from Billy Joel and there is dancing involved, and we all know how dancing gets every woman’s uterus aquiver.
Anyway, I hear its coming to St. Louis and being the good boyfriend that I am, I suggest that for her birthday, I’ll take her to this show.

Sweet Jesus, I didn’t know what I was getting into.

Seems simple enough, I go online, where I do the vast majority of my ticket buying, and order the tickets. Nope, no dice. The little pull-down menu where you select the type of credit card you will be paying with only had one choice: Visa. This is when it all comes flooding back to me…the damn commericals, just like the ones for the Salt Lake City Olympics…With the deep voiced guy stating at the end: “They won’t take American Express…and you can’t see it unless you have Visa.” Well of course all I had was MasterCard! Shit! Stupid Visa!

This “Visa Only” thing is freakin’ retarded! Why would a company, in this case the Fox, not take my money from my MasterCard! For Visa to come to a company and say “You know what you should do? You should only take our credit card. Sure there are lots of other credit cards out there, and granted we aren’t even the biggest, but you should take only our card. It will be worth it…even though you are probably going to piss off the other large group of people that don’t have Visa,” is retarded! Why would a company do this!? On the other hand, why does Visa do this? Ok, they are trying to spread their market share, but do the people at Visa really think that I’m going to go to the website, see that Visa is the only card I can use and then say to myself: “Damn, all I have is a MasterCard! You know what I’ll do? I’ll go out and get myself a Visa right now! Yeah! I love Visa!” Noone will ever do that! Never.

Oh yeah, back to my story…So I call The Fox and ask if I can use my MasterCard over the phone. The dipshit on the phone acts like I should know this and gets an attitude:

The Dipshit: “No! You can only use cash or check.”
Me: “Oh ok.” (You work the phones at the Fox you ass…you aren’t cool.)
Me: “So I have to drive down to you to get these tickets?”
The Dipshit: “No! You can go to any of our remote locations.”
Me: “Like…”
The Dipshit: “Any Famous Bar.”
Me: “Oh, of course, how did I not know…I got an A in Broadway Show Tours 101 in college…I can’t believe I forgot that.”

So I go down to Famous Bar and the lady there says I can’t even pay with a check, and gives me more attitude…right about the time I’m about to pick up a clothing rack and toss through their glass doors and in to their parking lot, her boss over hears us and correctly, lets me pay via a check.

So I have the tickets, and my girlfriend should feel very lucky that we are going in a few weeks. But if I see any Visa shit when I go there, the folks viewing the play might see a fight…and I’m not talking about a musical fight like on West Side Story.

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