Nicolas Cage, and his wife Alice have named their new baby boy Kal-El Coppola Cage. For those not in the know, Kal-El is Superman’s birth name, given to him by his Kryptonian parents. On Krypton its probably like naming your kid “Tom”, “Dick” or something cooler like “Mike”, but here on Earth its a weird ass name. I’m a certified Superman nut…every computer on my home network has a Superman related name (even my iPod is “Perry White”), when I take my shower tonight I’ll be drying myself with a Superman towel (there’s a little visual for the ladies out there!), and when I get in my car I have Superman floor mats. All that, and I still think Nicolas Cage is a retard for naming his kid Kal-El. However he is a retard with huge balls for exposing his geekiness to the world (just as I just apparently did) and for the eventual horrible life he will have as an old man because when you name your kid something stupid and they get their ass handed too them day after day in school they tend not to take care of you when you are drooling in the corner at the age of 92.

Good luck to you Nick Cage, because your kid will be coming after you one day.

Link: Oscar Winner Cage Becomes Father Again