The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain

January 3rd, 2006 | by dan |

Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can’t see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

More Random Chuck Norris Facts
And the Washington Post article that brought this golden nugget of web humor to my attention.

  1. 2 Responses to “The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain”

  2. By Mike on Jan 3, 2006 | Reply

    Every one of those are comic gold. I also enjoyed:

    Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this “a slow Tuesday.”

  3. By Mike on Jan 3, 2006 | Reply

    Every one of those are comic gold. I also enjoyed:

    Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this “a slow Tuesday.”

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