Coupe de Boule means Headbutt in French
When French soccer star Zinedine Zidane came in a little hard while trying to show Italy’s Marco Materazzi the sunburn he got on his head (Thats the story I made up for no reason and thats what I’m going with. I think its more whimsical.) at this year’s World Cup Finals the a good portion of the world went crazy. Another large portion of the world, most of them being Americans, woke up after sleeping through the last half of some NASCAR race (These are the same people that think Soccer isn’t a sport) and said “Why the hell are they showing this crap on Sportscenter when they could be showing Pre-Pre-Pre NFL Training Camp coverage!” Then there is a guy in France that decided to memorialize this great moment in French sporting history the only way the French know how: He made a stupid dance song, titled it Coupe de Boule (translation: headbutt) and proceeded to make an even stupider video for said song that doesn’t even have a single headbutt in it. Yeah, I know, I feel a bit dumb myself for not seeing this coming too.
Enjoy the video for Coupe de Boule after the jump.
Via SPIN
Gratuitous Kate Beckinsale and Friends Photo #23
A Message From the Editor: If you were wondering why this was late, go ask our web host, DreamHost, about it. And if you are a hot girl, really go ask them about it. Make sure to wear something sexy (like a Winger t-shirt with a slit cut in the front) and be all about them and flirty and junk. Then when they take you into the office to get it on, kick them square in the nuts and say “This is for Hell Yeah Bitch! .com being down you turd-stain!” That would be cool. Now back to the article…
Do you watch King of the Hill? You should. With The Simpsons slowly going down the other side of the funny bell curve, King of the Hill still is one of the funniest shows on TV. You have to really watch it though. The jokes are numerous and quick, but they aren’t always blatantly obvious or in your face as Homer-humor usually is. Where am I going with this? Did you know that Britney Murphy is the voice of the King of the Hill character Luanne Platter? You probably did. But did you know that Ms Murphy likes to spend her free time sitting on the hood of a taxi?
Now you do.
Two more pictures of Britney showing her love of hanging inside taxi’s after the jump.
Without a Laugh Track, You Don’t Know Whats Funny
TVSquad pointed the way to a blog by Ken Levine who, according to his bio, is “an Emmy winning writer/director/producer/major league baseball announcer.” And now he is a blogger. Oh how the mighty have fallen. Anyway, Ken writes up an interesting post today about the demise of canned laughter. Pretty interesting.
Network thinking about laugh tracks is this: When you see a comedy movie in a theatre you are surrounded by people laughing. The laugh track helps recreate that communal experience when you’re sitting in your home alone. For fifty years networks have stuck by this theory despite not one shred of evidence to suggest it is valid.
Finally, now, networks are beginning to come around. Audiences have loudly stated they want new rhythms in sitcoms. They’ve also said they hate laugh tracks. And since some of the recent better comedies (like SCRUBS and the OFFICE) don’t use one and are embraced, networks are relaxing their yuck box choke hold.
…
One final note: On CHEERS and FRASIER we used recorded laughs from our own shows. Not so with other series. A lot of the laughs you hear were recorded fifty years ago. Many of the people you hear laughing are now dead.
You shouldn’t be satisfied with this blockquote! You should be inspired to read it for yourself.
On a personal note, I always thought it would be awesome to have a laugh track of my own. It would be nice when you make a great joke that includes an obscure reference and no one laughs. Fire up the laugh track and then they know they missed something instead of looking at me like I’m crazy because I just referenced a Head of the Class character. The other added benefit would be to fire the laugh track when you or someone else says something innocuous to make everyone wonder what was so funny.
…or adapt it to work over the internet somehow to punch up a paragraph that after you re-read you realized it wasn’t funny at all. You know, stuff like that.
Stealing a Puppy By Putting It In Your Pants
So you walking by a pet store and you see “that puppy in the window…” What do you do? Nope, you don’t ask how much it is. The correct answer is: you walk inside the store and shove said puppy into your pants and then walk out. Thats what one man did in Plantation, Florida.
The man picked up the dog, stuffed it in his pants and walked out.
Store employees realized the puppy was missing soon after the dog-napper exited the store.
“We count the puppies every 15 to 20 minutes,” said pet store owner Larry Silvey. “We check the cribs, and we realized the puppy was stolen, so we went back, checked on the camera, and there he was, stealing the puppy.”
“I wish the guy was here right now,” Silvey continued. “I would like to take care of him. Anybody who would steal a puppy is like hurting a child.”
Silvey followed up with, “I saw him on his way out of the store. I didn’t find out till after we counted the puppies that he in fact was not happy to see me as I had previously hoped.”
Seriously though, there’s all kinds of weird stuff going on here. You know, besides the man shoving a puppy down his pants. You count the puppies every 15 minutes? How often are people stealing puppies from you? Also, stealing a puppy by shoving it down your pants is awfully weird and wrong, but its not on par with hurting a child. If I had to choose between hitting a puppy with a baseball bat or a child with a baseball bat, and assuming there wasn’t the option of hitting them both (you know, to be fair) then I would hit the puppy. Unless the kid is visibly retarded, there’s a chance, although slim, that he could grow up and do something amazing like cure AIDS or invent a love making robot that you can put life-like skins of celebrities on. The puppy has a zero percent chance of doing either one of those things. You loose Fido.
Oh and yes, there is video. It was some stupid ass Windows Media stream from the crappy news channel website article, but rest assured I ripped it off and uploaded it to youtube. Here it is, enjoy and pass it around. This is my first upload to youtube. Congratulate me on popping my youtube cherry with a guy that has a dog down his pants in the comments.
Mac Users Finally Get Skype With Video
Nothing better than a geeky company challenging other geeks to be “brave” and try their new pre-beta (isn’t that called alpha?) software. Today Skype called out the manliness of all OS X users by challenging us to be “brave” and try their new Skype with Video preview. Unless, you are a little pussy that doesn’t want video? Frankly though, if thats the case, please turn in your nerd glasses and your penis and step away from the computer.
I’m answered the challenge already by downloading it and signing in. However, since I don’t have a super-cool MacBook yet I don’t have a camera to test it on right now. I’m hearing good things though and plan to give it a whirl when I get home tonight. If you want to look me up tonight so we can get in our convertible, hold hands and drive off the cliff together into the scary abyss that is “preview technology” you can find me on skype as “mikehyb” Until then, be careful out there. The world of Alpha software is a scary place.
OS X Finder Hacking
Lifehacker had a nice little tip today on showing how to show hidden files within finder. Showing hidden files is as easy (if not immediately guessable) as entering these two lines into a terminal window:
defaults write com.apple.finder AppleShowAllFiles TRUE
killall Finder
(to hide files just change the TRUE to FALSE)
Knowing that I’d never remember the syntax for that ever again I put it into a simple bash script that can be ran from the command line. Read on to the rest of this post for the scripts and how to use them.
You Think You Like the Simpsons?
You think you like the Simpsons? Please. This guy likes the Simpsons.
Anyone have an idea how much this cost him, or how much time this took? Yikes. This isn’t as bad as the Disney Tattoo Guy (great website by the way), but still crazy. If I had a Simpsons tattoo, Lou (the black cop) would be front and center. In fact I think it would be just Lou. I have my reasons.
Via CityRag and CollegeHumor
Pops From Dirty Work Is Dead
If you haven’t seen the movie Dirty Work you should. It brilliantly stupid. Its one of my favorite movies with Norm MacDonald, Artie Lange, and the recently deceased Jack Warden. Sadly Jack Warden died recently and its too bad, he plays the dirty old man that I dream about being one day.
Oh yeah, he was also in some movie called All The President’s Men. I’ve heard good things, but its no Dirty Work.
Later Jack!
Link: Dirty Work
Link: Jack Warden
900 Posts. Get excited.
For the 900th post on Hell Yeah Bitch! .com I wanted to post something memorable…and quick because its 5:00 and I want to go home. I think this picture elegantly solves the problem while meeting both criteria.
Have a good weekend.
Via CollegeHumor
Gratuitous Kate Beckinsale and Friends Photo #22
This week hurt like eight bitches in a bitch boat. I’ve been dealing with a recurring medical ailment all week (and still am), we lost internet at my office on Tuesday, St. Louis got bitch slapped by a storm on Wednesday night (My neighborhood seems to have been hit the hardest with 80+ mph winds, but I am one of the lucky ones with power, cable and internet.), Thursday once again my office was without internet access or phones, and this morning I’m going to drink a glass of water that I thought was cold, but once it hit my lips I found it to be kinda lukewarm and thats gross. All of that adds up to a pretty craptastic week. Then today when I was gearing up to post this week’s “Kate Beckinsale” post, I noticed that I had only posted one article since last Friday. I suck. Feeling like crap, getting hit by a monster storm, and drinking less than cold water is no excuse, I should have done better than that and I apologize.
I will do better. Rest assured that soon articles that you have a subtle at best interest in and that are mildly funny producing an occasional chuckle will be flowing from my fingers, through the tubes of the internet and into your eyes…unless you are blind…then I guess you have some kind of reader doohickey which I will now make read the lyrics of K-Fed epic song Popozao
In Portuguese it means bring your ass
On the floor and move it real fast
I wanna see your kitty and a little bitta titty
Wanna know where I go when I’m in your city
Girl, don’t you worry about all the dough
Cuz a cat is coming straight outta the door
Ready rock them shows all the way to Rio
Bring that Brazil booty on the floor
Up, down, all around
Work that **** to this funky sound
Wanna see what I’m gonna owe
Po, Po, Po, Po, PopoZao, PopoZao
Po, Po, Po, Po, PopoZao, PopoZao
Po, Po, Po, Po, PopoZao, PopoZao
Wasn’t that fun? Now for those of you that can see, here are a few pictures of Christina Agularasdflsdkafd (whatever) looking hot recently. For those blind people, here comes another kick in the junk: You may or may not be aware that you won’t be able to see the pics of Christina, plus I just made you listen to a screen-read version of Popozao. I’m sorry. I’m a dick.
(2 more after the jump)