Gratuitous Kate Beckinsale and Friends Photo #61: Ashlee Simpson

April 27th, 2007 | by Mike |

This week you get Ashlee Simpson. I’m almost certain she’s still considered famous. There is no doubt that she is considered stupid though. Anyone who goes from an annoying butter-face to someone smoking hot (and probably still annoying, but who cares right, because she’s smoking hot now) and doesn’t even use her new hotness to sell records or books or calendars or special edition sexual lubricant, or whatever. Look, she, or her doctor, did a fantastic job of becoming sexy enough to get out of the shadow of her sister’s rack to do…nothing. Ta da. I know its unreasonable to think that a greek god like myself could get much hotter, but if I managed to increase in hotness in the timespan that Ashlee Simpson did, I wouldn’t be wasting my new talent going to some lame Hot 100 party like where these pictures were taken, I would be out making movies in between orgies and on weekends I would be making movies of my orgies. …wait are orgies the thing that involves lots of real girls doing me or the thing that involves lots of pictures on my computer screen, peanut butter and my neighbor’s dog? I can’t remember. Both end the same if they go well and both end in nasty bite marks if they go bad. I always get them confused.

Either way, here’s a few pictures of Ashlee humping me with her eyes. One here for easy viewing and two after the jump because I think you and me just really go great together, don’t you?

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