Richard Jewell, the guy that the FBI accused of being the Olympic Bomber in 1996, has died.  He was 44.  Jewell is believed to have died from natural causes, but the FBI are going on record that they believe it was a suicide.

Here is Dick Jewell (Um, why was this guy not called Dick Jewell by the press in 96?  How awesome is “Dick Jewell”?) on Saturday Night Live, with the greatest Weekend Update anchor of all time: Norm Macdonald.

If there was any more proof needed that the internet community is nothing more than a bunch of horny dudes, look no further than Justine…or iJustine…or that chick hugging her MacBook Pro.  This chick appears to have created herself into an internet celebrity by posting and endless stream of either nonsensical video diarrhea, re-posting on topics that have already been done, and of most importantly pulling off the trick of being a girl on the internet while not being a fatty.

Lets elaborate. 

Feel free to click the “nonsensical video diarrhea” link here or from above if you need proof of the Cleavland Steamer she drops on the poor, already soiled chest of the internet on a seemingly daily basis.  Lets not even get into her Twitter stream.  “I think I broke the internet“  Ah, brilliant.  Thanks.  Thats the kind of sharp wit that I need sent to my cell phone via SMS ASAP so I can take time to really enjoy it while in in the middle of trying to figure out how if this hooker is really 18 or if should believe the ID she just gave me that has the top right part of Captain Crunch’s face on the back.  (Editor’s Note: I ended up going with the ID.  Who knows, maybe recycling cardboard for ID’s is a new cost cutting measure…plus, what was I going to do, un-dress up like my 3rd grade teacher while banging her?)

As far as the story she “broke” a little while ago about the huge iPhone bills.  It wasn’t news.  It was just old news…in video form…done by a girl…that isn’t fat.  Sure Scoble got a boner for it, but the only surprise there is that his thank you post wasn’t followed by a long rambling video with him adjusting the camera from the front seven times while name dropping friend’s names in the tech industry (Wow!  You know THE Dave Winer!??!) and how they feel about this issue.  The fact of the matter is that I, not even owning an iPhone, had heard that story at least a week before her video broke and frankly even then it was a non-story.  You think AT&T didn’t know they were printing out that many pages for each bill?  Of course they did.  Sure its stupid, but to think this ditsy broad is, in the parlance of our times, changing the world somehow by making the 18973284732987324th Apple commercial spoof while flipping through her bill is just slightly more retarded than paying to go see Ben Stiller in another movie where he plays a lovable but goofy and uptight guy.

You are cute and own a computer.  Its rare.  We get it.  But unless we are so hard up we think that poon is the misspelling of “pwn”, we don’t need to see it all the time.

Sexy Update:  I love how the Google treats the search term “justine” so differently between a web search and an image search.  (Note: For the full effect, turn off Google’s image filter and don’t be at work when clicking on the image search)  Google issued a “No Comment” on whether their image search results reflect the company’s official stance on what Justine is actually good for.

1. Be smart enough to know the faces and get a joke about the Communist Party.
2. Get $15
3. Go to Threadless
4. Buy that shirt.
5. Be cool like me.

(No, I’m not even getting any referrer money for this, I just think that shirt is brilliant and I thought I should share.)

Yeah, those pages on your web 2.0 site where people can view a random sampling of the activity that is going on at your ultra-cool community sure seem like a good idea don’t they?  The fact remains however they even the best of those pages can be ruined by the same thing that can ruin a good lesbian porno: a cock…or six.

Zoomr, the Dan to Flickr’s Dave in the photo site Olympics, prides themselves on being “No Limits Photo Sharing” and they aren’t kidding.  Click through to the jump if you want to see what the surprised visitors to Zoomr’s “Discover” page recently saw.

via Valleywag

… Continue Reading

Baseball teams I hate:

1. Cubs
2. Braves
3. Red Sox

The true irony of this list is that although I hate the Braves enough to be my #2 team, some of my favorite players have played for the Braves (With the exception of Chipper Jones. Fuck him.  Long story. ).  That odd tradition continued when they got Mark Teixeira.  What can I say the guy is bad ass.  If the Cardinals somehow found a way to play 2 first basemen, and we got Teixeira, I would be so happy I would write a song.  Well not really.  But there are some that would…like these dudes:

Too bad you still suck.

My wallet just got that sinking feeling…

According to Ryan Block of Engadget:

The iPhoneSIMfree.com team called us up to prove their claim
that they cracked Apple’s iPhone SIM lock system, and prove it they
did. (No, we don’t have a copy of the unlock software, so don’t even
ask us, ok?) The six-man team has been working non-stop since launch
day, and they’re officially the first to break Apple’s SIM locks on the
iPhone with software. It’s done. Seriously. They wouldn’t tell us when
and how they would release it to the public, but you can certainly bet
that they’ll try to make a buck on their solution (and rightly so). We
can hardly believe the iPhone’s finally been cracked. No, scratch that
– we just can’t believe it took this long.

They even have video up.  Now leave me alone as I begin to ponder if its a good idea to run a hacked phone all the time…

So I just found out that the dude in the orange shirt from that dancing video everyone knows‘ name is David Elsewhere.

Here is his ‘best of” clip:

Just a little something to pass the time on a Thursday.

I’ve had iMovie 08 installed on my MacBook Pro for over a week now and only yesterday was there a perfect chance to use it and give it a good spin.

I couldn’t use it though (and had to fall back to iMovie 06) because iMovie 08 wouldn’t import the MPEG files.

For a release that appeared to be a “lets start over again and make this amazing”-type release, they should have the very basics (#1 Importing video) down with zero issues.  I was one of the few that wasn’t pissed about iMovie and was willing to give it a chance, but my confidence took a big hit.

(I’m installing the update now, so lets see what that does…)

You might have already heard or are already getting that tingling feeling in your pants, but the guys at ThePirateBay have relaunched the classic bittorrent source Suprnova.org.  They also have the following press release:

Suprnova has been down for some years due to some heavy pressure from the copyright lobby.
The former owner sloncek donated suprnova to The Pirate Bay – and as you know, we like to kick ass and bow for noone!

We were going to keep this site a secret until we had finished it, but of course it leaked, that’s how internet works.
So now that the word is out, we’re releasing it!

Please consider these first weeks/months as a beta test. Since we love
all you guys and gals so much we decided to keep it an open beta test.
That means, please behave, don’t complaint to much and if you discover
any weird bugs or problems, let us know.

Some of you have also already discovered our new forum, Suprbay! Which
is a joint forum for both Suprnova and The Pirate Bay. Discuss movies, music, love and whatever with your fellow pirates.

Finally, some words for non-internet loving companies:
This is how it works. Whatever you sink, we build back up. Whomever
you sue, ten new pirates are recruited. Wherever you go, we are
already ahead of you. You are the past and the forgotten, we are the
internet and the future.

y’arr!

These guys could have me if they wanted to.

So I’m reading Peter Gammon’s latest blog entry on ESPN.com its about St. Louis’s new Golden Boy Rick Ankiel.   Its refreshing to read Gammons and not hear about the Red Sox, but I felt the opposite of refreshing when I read this comment on the blog entry by some bitch “named” rider11 (emphasis mine):

As a Cardinal fan, I don’t think I can quantify how much Ankiel’s
return has meant to the team this year, and what a breath of fresh air
he will be as the teams retools and moves forward. As a baseball fan,
I’m just in awe. Thanks as always, Peter, for a great article (I will
never, ever call your work “blogging”).

What the fuck does that mean?  Is blogging some lower form of writing and is simply paragraph after paragraph of dick jokes?  On this site yes…but not everywhere!  It sucks for you that I live in St. Louis too and I found out a few things about you that I will now send through the tubes and out into the world:

1. rider11 got his name because he rode 11 dudes in one night in college.  I hear there is video too:  Easy Rider (The Gay Porn Version)
2. The most common thing said to him: “Is it in yet?”
3. His kids hate him.
4. His favorite show of all time: Step By Step. He likes Patrick Duffy.
5. I heard that he smokes, but its this weird brand I’ve never heard of.  My source said he smokes cock.

Peter Gammons.  One hell of a blogger.